4 year old Logic

These were a couple of pretty funny conversations with Jake the other night during our bedtime ritual . . .

Mom: Jake, you need to have a bath tonight.

Jake: No, Mom.

M: Yup, you haven't had one for a couple of days and tonight's a good night.

J: What do I smell like? (He is smelling his arm)

M: Dirt and sweat.

J: Nope. I smell like roses. I don't need one.

M: Jake, you don't smell like roses. If you did, I would be able to smell you from over here.

J: Mom, I really do. I smell like roses so I don't need a bath.

Dad (yelling from downstairs): Jake, you don't want to smell like roses. Roses are girly. Do you want to smell like a girl?

J: Okay, I'll take a bath.

After his bath . . .

Mom: Jake, let's go brush your teeth.

Jake: I already did.

M: No, son, Mom needs to do it at nighttime.

J: I want Dad to do it.

M: He's not here so it's my turn.

J: I already did it.

M: Jake, you made the deal with me that I brush your teeth at night and you brush them in the morning. It's nighttime.

J: Mom, that was the old Jake. This is the new one.

M (laughing): What?

J: That was the old Jake. I am the real one and that is not the deal.

M: Yes, that is the deal. You made it and we are sticking to it.

J: I ask the questions around here.

M (laughing again): Well, you can choose to let me brush your teeth or let the dinner bugs eat at them all night and one day you might wake up without any teeth and you'll smile like this (I smiled folding my lips over my teeth looking really goofy--a little exaggeration, I know)

J (laughing): Okay, my bad. You can do it. But I get to do it in the morning.

M: Okay.

J: By the way, Mom, can you change my name to Sonic? That would be awesome.

M: No, it's already on your birth certificate as Jacob.

J: How about Jacob Sonic Stuart and you can just call me Sonic?

M: Well, why don't we leave your name like it is and sometimes we can just call you Sonic for fun when you are running really fast?

J: Okay, thanks, Mom. That's awesome!

Mom (thinking to herself): What an awesome creative goofball.